ACCIDENTAL DISSAPOINTMENT

No Holds Barred

      Tell me about practicing in a sterile environment, if one may become anything truly different and applicable. Make clear to me the absence of the choices I really care about, Have I found myself wayward?

      The internet keeps us from being in all places at one time. I can’t remember what was in place before this inhibition, but you and I have certainly always had our differences. The world is getting smaller as the population expands at an accelerated rate.

      Fear and laziness may be the winning combination of nonviolence. This world may blink out of sight in a moment. Others live on, give us hope in this vicarious gestation. A moment of discomfort cannot last forever. The horizons must be broken.

      Impoverished minds are waking up. I was handed every advantage along with every disadvantage. Everything I know is right before me, and all that is left is inevitably wrong.

      Way too many people are dying from preventable causes. Love your mother, do everything in her memory and honor. Greed and miscommunication: unnecessary death. Don’t we know that we are understood and provided for; we don’t need to worry about anything, everything, something or nothing. We simply needn’t worry. It is the only waste of time. Don’t forget who you are, that you are in control and this is what you have chosen. Use it to become who you next want to be.

      “They should have to go through it because I did, because how could there be any other way?” The basis of all agenda.

      I’m standing in front of my 900 degree oven, watching a live performance mesh with the back bar noise and enhance the Olympics simultaneously projected above. This could be Hell if I wasn’t Satan. Hell hath no flame.

      They come up to me often to ask me stupid questions, usually “where’s the bathroom” or “do you sell slices.” They are stupid for opposing reasons, our price and item availabilities being clearly and readily listed, while our bathroom location is not. Our bad for making them feel dumb, but they could have asked someone else.

      It seems the only way I may save my money is to think of the things I need, to need the things I think.

      Buckle down, save everything.

      Expire quickly, be fresh.

      Live your own life, both of them.

      We don’t share your opinion,

      we only share ours.

      I was loathing coming in here today moments before I actually did. I know death is near because of how I’ve been consistently practicing desensitization, I don’t know it’s happening while it does. There is no reason for us to be afraid of each other, it just happens that we’re here together because it’s what we have in common.

      I’m no great pizza cook or musician because I want to be. If I am any I must be all, and at the moment I seem to only be a writer, a left-handed one at that.

      I’m not wasting my time even though I’ve been here before, these seem and feel like new choices, the lines are the same but they draw different shapes based on the patterns that have already been outlined countless times before.

SOMEWHERE IN THE NORTHERN HEMISPHERE at the beginning of time. . .

      I have three mothers and each of them have a bitterness in their heart for me. I remember their names and what they look like. Their offspring I have reabsorbed, and now the world has never known such evil, and it will continue in this way. The birth of a bodyless form, the hermaphroditic spirit, that I may appreciate as master and not any sort of my own creation. I remain bound to this world, but now we work together to correct future error, for this world has only one outcome, just as it began.

      I do not like myself, love myself or hate myself. I am myself inevitably all the time. The only problem is fed to me just before I stand up to reveal the solution. It’s only a matter of time before I am rich and famous or dead, and then the other will soon follow. This world has nothing left to satisfy my desire. I must concentrate on the flame or it will never become summer again.

      I know what I do is excellent and anybody could do it, it’s just a matter of time and place. And I could further devote myself to this cause in a much more obvious way, but I don’t want to own the place, I just want to be money wherever I am.

      I caught a whiff of something I haven’t smelled since I worked at Twig’s, something unidentifiable and unmistakable, something about restaurant anxiety: the knowledge that there’s always something more to do as long as we are here.

      The money I make is an illusion. I realize this is somehow important information and my intended audience is only my future self.

      I’m not at all guilty for the level of training I received to qualify me for working here. It was mutual, they exploited something they only thought they understood because how could they really begin to know what I’ve gone through? I don’t have plenty of paper all the time, where I’m going or where I’ve been.

1)  Eat something

2)  Love everything

3)  Do anything

4)  Keep nothing

“When the pupil is ready, the master appears.”

Do your best, end in gest

“I’m not trying to argue with you, that’s just sort of happening.”

“I’ll come back before I leave.”

      The downfall of my own dreams may be accredited to me, my body will be purged from gestation and I will be left to fend for myself, turning the world with my feet.

      I’m only an alcoholic when I’m on vacation. When I go back to Seattle on Monday it’s strict survival. I don’t need to do anything to have a good time. I need to do nothing. And I certainly won’t get tied down here. My only perspective is moving on.

Hard work, ITS HARDER TO DO SOMETHING ORIGINAL

Arguism, treasonable, in-body experience, hyperbolic guilt chamber, neurotic device (see light blue). At the corner of 3^RD EYE/4^TH WALL. Anthropologize anthropologies.

Exosuit with jet pack shoes, powered by self metabolized excess powerloss (piezoelectical). Every spare movement is captured in a recursive generator (gyroscopes)

Beautiful babies, are born every day, and old folks go, to die in the same way, suddenly, the path before’s, the past behind. Contradict, contracept. All geometry is sacred.

“Life is what happens while you’re waiting for life to happen.”

“Throwing [to stretch a pizza dough] is a sin.”

I’m not evil, I’m just up to no good.

The patterns in Saturn, my brother the war god, and my journey to a distant star

I’m frying the biggest fish there is, because if he doesn’t exist, than neither do I

Silver on the surface of mars

Why do they tell mothers not to let their babies grow up to be cowboys? (what is a cowboy)

How much of each organ does an organism need to survive? (what defines survival)

APPARENTLY BEING HIGH IN PUBLIC IS NEVER A PROBLEM

i have the sneaking, suspicion I was lied to, and now I don’t know, who I am, life as a painting, and I’ve flown, like tie times, I’m a manager, a leader, of my own cold sould

what is is, never what it should be

you don’t know what you do

my deepest fears, coming true, every day

in old age, I’m allowed to be elusive, in youth, my questions inconclusive

and now, this is all I am, expanding the parabola, exploring limitation

They should only eat, if they are the, last of their kind. Evil should mean famine.

Self guiding, systems are of, no real, consequence

Trilogy: if the past is children, and the future is travel, then the present is music

We must break before we refuse

The only difference between now and then is that, I believe in now.

Prematurely born, _________ dead.

I’m a cross section, a distraction.

They will make damn well sure, to take damn good care

My car has an ashtray, and a CD player and is, parked in the driveway, I don’t see the correlation, I don’t have a reason to leave, the windows are down, the A/C is on, the sun roof is a moon roof

Parabolic affliction, invisible guilt chamber

Legal drugs keep good men down, in the dirt, underground, where none is seen or heard or felt, and to face the light is to blind and melt

Conflagration- a big destructive fire

Taking advantage, of each other, finding romance in, one another, believing real love, is blind, can’t feel the things, you left behind. She was a machine for the details. Thelessness. Inference is assumption. Everything happens for a reason, nothing good happens by accident. The Chasmos. Grey magic. Breaking news. Accidence. May I not forget my place among the human race.

Considering a set of stairs, 3 places to be:

·         ABOVE

·         BELOW

or

·         UPON

It didn’t take a long time to walk a short dock

I care about things and some people. Everything has its purpose and some use those things to their best extent.

      I am wasting my time, in a world of mutual time wasting. Every move I try to make is blocked in inevitable reciprocation. I couldn’t manipulate myself out of a paper bag without finding myself in a plastic one.

      I am impatient in my futility. I want to get these failures overwith already so I may have my dreams come true.

      No one understands, nobody listens and it all goes nowhere. Don’t take it personally, but we may as well be no one, or anyone, everyone, someone. I can do anything. This is where it all happens. Stop wasting time, corrupting your chance. Enjoy yourself and your not self for what they are and what they do for us.

      She is beautiful, that much is not beyond me. I am not afraid of that.

      This is no tragedy. It’s fucking hilarious. Time heals all wounds it provides. Nothing would be possible without nothing. I don’t trust what I look like and my biology. I could be figuring myself out some other way but this is the action of my collected action, my subconscious adaptation based on what has worked for me so far. I have a shell. And a switch for that shell. The more I expose myself, the more I must hide.

      “Can you hide me? I’m not exactly sure who it is that is after me.”

I had a dream about the police and awoke pleasantly to a cup of coffee in my face. “Do you take anything in your coffee besides chocolate chip cookies?”

      Do your due, I’m terrified of prison, enjoy life while you can, exploit what you understand.

      “Don’t you know your killing your poor mother with that foolish behaviour?” Yes, I do, and so allowing my rich one to live, the one she didn’t know existed, with subjugates and luxuries.

      I AM ABSORBED BY THE WORLD, I’VE FORGOTTEN who I am. Time and time again. I expect the unexpected, At the most inopportune time, I hold it in, Save it for a later date, a hot one, that goes nowhere

      I don’t need anything, which is sort of like saying I need nothing. I don’t necessarily need less than I have, but I also can’t justify having any more. I know the world, I’ve lived here my whole life, I know that expectation can make me miserable but without a plan I’m going nowhere.

      Food and sex are not inevitable parts of perception. Of life and death, but existence may be without them. Every thing we think we need we do, but that does not mean these things are constantly or consistently necessary.

      We are champions of light, tourists of the underworld. The only thing we all have in common, it’s better than we thought it would be.

      No such thing as a free lunch. “There’s only one thief; everyone else is just trying to get their shit back.” –Old Army saying

      I heard a horror story of a drug that, with just one well placed whiff, the consumer loses all free will and self control. A couple days later they awake in a park, go to their apartment only to find it empty, their landlord explaining the resident came with a truck and mysterious people to move out immediately, their belongings never to be seen again.

      “A great spirit will always find opposition in lesser minds.”

      I admit I’ve been harboring terrorists, using my first person creativity towards affirmative action and understanding. I know we all do our best. It’s not the person I don’t trust. it’   s the drug.

      A: “A quiet mouth don’t get fed” B: “. . . but a quiet mouth ain’t hungry.”

Welcome to victimhood, population: YOU.

      “I can’t believe it happened to me, and what kind of prevention exists in a world made of inhibition and filters? We still have our intuition, our bad feelings and our gut reaction.”

Secrets are trouble, lies are problems

      Last night the world was ending, it looked much like today, bright and blue. A bridge fell on my leg and a building. My world was falling as it tried to destroy me. I woke before it was over.

I realized the worst way to possibly die is to be a hamster flushed down a toilet. It starts out bad and gets worse and worse even though it doesn’t really go anywhere.

the booty call center, 2036 AD

     Everyone and their parents have a cell phone these days. Strangers on the street and in their car, sitting beside you, wondering where your phone is. What a magickal device, a portal to transport you to where you want to be from where you deserve to be. It's a very simple dichotomy, expensive, narcissistic, consuming, and in the end a complete waste of time, our own, our  neighbours', and that for which any tangible progress may be achieved.
     Yes we are falling into a tradition, one that will make it quite a cold winter for the phoneless. It's a great advantage, one that we don't understand and so may as well exploit the best we can. And we all find dissatisfaction in it on some level, just like with everything else. Why must I ruin it for everybody? I'm not, I'm just making a note of the score, as referee, discussing the certain ball in play. It is with a stroke of luck you have. Even handed such, someone must have believed in what you are doing.
     We used to have guns, horses, cigarettes, books, food drink and each other, now this? A platform of information electronically wired in the palm of our hands, to metaphysically project our desires upon our hearts and minds? What kind of sick Joke is this? Somebody's been watching too muchTV.
     Wouldn't you like to live without memory or fear? Wouldn't that be better for everybody? Do you see whats holding you back and how you would prefer to change your previous course now for that certain benefit?

Executive decision for mutual dreams

      Whoever heard of a water addiction, because it does nothing to enhance the experience. Sometimes that's all it takes, to get an edge over a hump. Damn those for letter worlds.
     It's funny because it's true. Same difference. We're living an american's dream, who wasn't realized until we are. Our spiral only gets better with time, and though the end of that is ever nearing, it still seems worth seeing past the darkness. We ultimately care for our own struggles, which only lose beyond us.
     Magic is overrated, a lost cause, in the name of effect. The tricks on us, the aged diseased and traumatized. Us comfortable in this nightmare of separation. We dont realize what we're losing, let alone that we're losing at all. It took patience to get here and we don't get them back.
     excuses are dead promises. Life is a glimpse of tomorrow

Consensual contextual

      I've been here before, in this place and choice. I remained, safe and sane until I was no longer needed. I only want to live in the sun with my friends, in cooperation of the inevitable. It got under my skin, the familiar abuse, and now a reminder of darker times, past and future. Our mother would be proud if she could only see that we've gotten better, stronger. But where is she? What planet was she granted? Inherited?
I'm not.changing anyone or anything, I am very particular of whom I effect and why. I haven't learned my lesson. My pain, my empire, it's all my fault. I do not want life because there is nothing else to want.
     As I write I do not have you in mind. I don't believe my own lies. This country was founded on tobacco, slaves and garbage, now without dreams we only see coping mechanisms. We've forgotten who we aren't and never will be, so who is left
     I've reached a level of maturity, unknowingly having raised my arm. I wanted to know what would happen if I agreed, if I'd become something better. This time, I'm working hard at everything I want to leave, so my more obvious void will be a welcoming model of success. My pursuit is for light, the absence of unknown threat and a reason to come back, to wake up and be well.
I keep fighting the good fight of unseen motivation, ghosts and legends, to be rembered as a catalyst for the possible world.
     Anything that cannot be shouted from a speeding car to another on the opposite direction is a waste of time, a distraction and an early grave.

Interview

Interview (thy rhyme intentional)

How will you be remembered? Did you try hard at everything you wanted to become? Did you find what you were looking for? Was there only one possible outcome? How long did it take you to realise where you needed to get and what you needed to get there? Was it all it was cracked up to be? Was it as interesting as fleeting? Were you constantly longing for something greater for you and your loving ones? Was it needless to say? Were you swept away? Did gravity take hold as you fell sideways? Were you taken care of? Did you feel it or did it take some time, some regret? Is it really over? Is it really going to end? Will it ever?

Scopolamine

The dream I remember, where everything makes sense and nothing happens. The only way this world is possible. I was conjured, manifested, like water or a devil.
Nothing is to be feared, so we may be taken care of. Outside, out of control, mysterious.
Significant meaning, inevitable coincidence. Death dance. Enjoy. Escape.
Man made, woman controlled. Looking with my hands for the power 

and with hers for the missing piece.
Consciousness is here, creation is now. I am weak as I psyche myself out. I change my world in hopes of better than the best.
I always forget the bell takes a toll when it rings. My life is lived as silence, no chance of Illness or forgiveness.
I was born with a number on my forearm. It is my age through all of time, the one I reach on a daily basis.

Universal Cerebellum

Whats the difference

Between what was and

What will be

Is it now or then

This or that

All or nothing

None or both

And who's to say when it will end

Are you watching closely

As the clocks a-tickin

There's only time to waste

Forget everything you know

You know it's the only way

To find a way

Up out and away

Plastic resemblance

All standstill

It's what they didn't know they wanted

Their own protection

I'm on the field

Tinnitus

     Piracy is a struggle, to do everything we need to do at every expense, especially in such a state as nonviolence, as counterintuitive as that is. Without a ship or first mate, it's the only way we may fight the singularity together.
     I know I'm crazy and definitively there is nothing I my self may do about that. I have a people to respect and uphold, one that I shan't annoy with notions of vernacular. I've been trained to Play games and to love the machine, to Pursue the details and to anticipate life to begin. At this point I am alone and I know it's good. The nightmare is good.
       When I come to, so will you. When it's over it will be all happiness and virtue. Until then I hate you just because you're not here. Stay very far away. Don't waste my time.

Banana Milkshake Inhalation (B.M.I.)

I too would be a great figurehead if I had not reverse brainwashed myself. I wanted to bide my time, so I may enjoy old age. I am too small and weak and ugly to truly be invested in. Everything I have done has been with good reason, and now I may die at any moment because of my sufferings.

I know I won't change anything, that the only difference the world holds is in complete reciprocation.

There exists evil and it does not know itself. It may only assume.

When it is too late I will be far far away, never to be reached again. I will not come back because I don't believe in unfinished business. Every bridge remains as an unburned something, because everything burns, everything burns.

apoplexy is getting me down. I am undiagnosed but I know what it feels like. everything burns. you can throw water on an electrical fire but you shouldn't because it will probably make it worse.

Do not worry or fear, about me or anything. We will die, until then we will change.

THOUGHT
FEELING
DESIRE
ACTION
HEALTH

there is a certain brink that cannot be taught or understood. evil exists in the world and it must be destroyed.

there is a thing that can only be felt. it exists.

my face is asymmetrical. my face.

dark park beer post

I sold my soul. Hard work is a waste of time. I now know I'm feared by those who don't understand me.


Last night I hypothetically threatened a life of someone I thought I knew. "Why would you do that to me? How could you do that to me?" In one instance it was a gun and then a knife. I thought they were ready for that caliber of deep thinking. My vivid imagination met their impressionable mind, we shook hands and they invited me to their birthday party next month, just five days after mine. But only after he ran to safety.


We have funny friends, ones that we've always knew existed because we were shown all sorts of movies when we were too young. Our parents didn't have time for us like they wanted, so we all became orphaned to the path of least resistance, not so bad as a similar plight. Everything we could possibly remember, someone else does is and will, one step all around us. They knew we would be safe at daycare because the television doesn't have long fingers and ill intent.


I've met a lot of people in Seattle, not any more than I would've if I had stayed, but at least we're blind together here. I once had an eye and they pushed me away, I left because I had to.


I'm sorry I made her life a living Hell, even if it just lasted for a moment. I still don't know what that meant for her but I know what pain is.


I'm not old; I'm tormented, but that's an easy mistake.
Sarcasm is lost to the text.
I don't know your mind but I hope you accept mine.


I do terrible things. Everything I do is terrible because I am terrible. I am a product of a terrible factory that was walking distance from my childhood home and I was lied to, lied to, lied to.


There are two sides to the tapestry

one for you

walk into and leave before it’s

Futilism                                $1000.00 suit                      social contract

Clear my appointment head

Menu  

Pepperoni pizza w/P. butter, Kosher dill pickle   ORANGE JUICE AND COFFEE

EGG + HONEY on toasted whole wheat

EGG + MUSTARD            

                BACON

                CHEDDAR

                GARLIC

                ROSEMARY

                BBQ

MOZZARELLA EGG ROLL

PB + J EGG ROLL

CINNAMON PULL APARTS

Applesauce dessert cups

Fresh whipped cream

Thai peanut skewers

                Chx’n, LAMB, BEEF, salmon?, shrimp?

Ginger beer oatmeal

Jagermeister ice cream

Stuffed French toast

Malts + Shakes

Q: why is it the doctor’s job to worry?

A: they have all the patients.

Like a bandaid with the best intentions                  constructive disobedience           2 stomachs, 1 reaction                   Bifurcation

Individual

An agreement between master and existence (implied slave)

[Nurse Weirdhate] or [how I learned to stop caring and love the machine]

Vivaldi violin concerto in D

Schubert unfinished symphony

RAVEL BOLERO

New World

Carmina Burana ORFF

HAYDN

DAY TRIPPER

A necessarily comfortable experiencing of necessary comfort and experience

Butler to the future

Omniuniversal eclecticism

Nuclear dogwaste

Landfill people

I do not care for a world of darkness. I am most interested when the sun is the highest. I will soon know my own strength, memory and rhythm.

Apostasy- poision4 da peeps

The coolest of the cruel, it takes two to duel, to soothe the savage fool (who eats up all our fuel gruel)

Hope faith trust and fear              elusive bonds that keep us here

Burn or get burned         fuck or get fucked           only happens once          only has to happen once

Having my way with words

Ungovernable

Too many opportunities cause depression of productivity, at least perception of such. The balance is cancer; I’m not looking forward to embarrassment. There is a disconnect and I remember everything you said only when we find each other most important.

I’m practicing my timing.

“It’s porn if you want it to be.”

Woman is a bad word                    soft people                         love bodies

DIRTY                    churning butter                                putting pie on windowsill

                I’m not against public schools, but that’s not to say I’m for them, either. Do not argue with me about something that is realistically impractical, because practice only approaches perfect and the equal opportunity provided by institutions today, “made accessible” for the entire populations, puts out achievers and not on a luck basis. THE EXTRINSIC HOPE AND FEAR OF FORMAL INSTRUCTION is A WASTE OF TIME.

Compassion shall not be learned; expel the obsessive.

                School should be fun, for why otherwise would anyone have any heart in it, at which point true learning is impossible.

D.R.A.G. (Drug Relief Advocacy Group)

To posit relief:

·         To drugs (the oppressed, mis/ununderstood substance)

·         For drugs (to gain responsible use, regular, recreational, medicinal or otherwise)

·         From drugs (for us to move on)

·         Of drugs (to accept that the induced change, whatever it may be, is positive)

adjust abuse

APOSTASY NOW

What will I be remembered for? Not necessarily how; rich traditions are pushed through eyes as well as resource. Interpretations evolve and reasons become lost, the downfall of the individual could only eventually find physically necessary

The deplorable depths of self-deprication

                I remember what it was like to accept a certain Hell. I found myself with absolutely no way out, and I didn’t want one. I deserved to be there

BIG SUN LOVE

The worlds source of selfishness is troubles

The worlds troubles are the source of selfishness

Are we assessing the troubles or the source of troubles? False dilemma

I’d rather not assert myself in petty games. Leave it to a professional. Let bygones go by.

I was raised correctly, by the unfamiliar, the interesting. I admonished my demons, left them to rot in solitude.

                Nothing should be free. Consequently, we each have different definitions of nothing: that which we take for granted, without which this life would not only be not worth living, but impossible to exist.

“The cracked ones let the light in.”

Negativity is only a concept

ANTIPRO

DO YOUR DUE

Nag Chomsky

Bipolar and equanimous

Where do the French Canadians fit into all of this?

The haves and halve-nots            is it littering to place a core beneath an apple tree?          Do we hate what we don’t understand?      Quality in all walks, looking back and watching a movie that would be painful to see if I wasn’t part of it.

Do what you want; the body will compensate. Head while you are a quit. I know who I am and who I want to be; I will become and die.

GERMS ARE PEOPLE TOO              blank space is expensive              outer, personal, empty

The buttered rum French toast                 cooked in ethereal grease           exoteric

I’m still in gestation and alive in WAR and may we never know what the fighting’s for

The Parthians, wild beasts of the plague

Mount Kun-Lun, the center of the world

                I look around and I see the untapped potential of dirty power, much like electricity but more integrated with nature, less understood, cycling and evolving                     Fear is the base of awe and astonishment, and I want to be afraid of the details rather than the grandeur, so I may do my part as a progressive human.

Seeing everything           in a fractal           of irreducible quality      and feeling no different

Is it right? To condense beyond one’s self? A reducible existence? I know what I’m doing?

What’s the word for half full?

Monodimensionality:  the state of being in 1^st, 2^nd, 3^rd, etc., rather than one, two, or three etc. dimensions

                I would never kill anyone, not myself, my brother, my father or son. No woman or animal. No matter how rude or unnecessary, not because they will get theirs, but because I certainly have mine.

                In modern America, where we are seemingly unbounded by consequence of opposing resource, the only solution is equanimity.

                When the world falls, we may know the responsible by the style of their penmanship.

The infinite path less traveled

                It’s cleaner here, that’s the first thing I notice. I like it more because of this.

               There is really nothing to be afraid of. Shadows are meant to appropriate about dark passions, subtle human truths.

                I know I have something to share with the world and I was just waiting for angel investors.

                I want success like they want it, certain death and destruction because war is lucrative, as I first learned in public school.

                I don’t realize specifically how I tip the scales because I do so much for free, in the name of American Dreams.

                I’m fun to have around, I don’t want that to change.

                Bleeding is always expensive.

I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.

We don’t have a population problem beyond a distribution problem.

A movie theater we walk into and leave before it’s over and after it’s started

Q: Schroedinger and Heisenberg walk into a bar. What are they thinking about?

A: Something else

The problem is never far from the solution. A combination of the two.

Where do babies/money come from?

I’m not trying to change anything.

To make brown sugar, they first remove the molasses from the raw and refine it to pure white, then they reincorporate the molasses.

                 

Quality of Life

instructions: Answer all questions to the best of your ability at a comfortable speed. The whole survey should take about 5-15 minutes. Feel free to email your results to me at: mathyouverymuch@gmail.com. Fill the subject bar as "q.o.l. results", along with the time and place.

Time?

Place?

1. What is your name?

2. What is your age?

3. Where do you live?

4. How do you get around?

5. What makes you happy?

6. What makes you sad?

7. What do you eat/drink the most?

8. What do you do to survive?

9. What are your interests?

10. What's the best thing that's ever happened to you?

11. What are your parent's names?

12. Where are they?

13. Do they work?

14. Do you keepin touch with your family?

15. Do you have goals?

16. Do you have struggles?

17. What do you want out of life?

18. What do you want to have happen to your remains and property after you die?

Sammy Stink parts I and II

Sammy Stink goes to the Dentist

There was once a fair maiden of average proportion who lived alone in her small cottage among the blackberry brambles on the outskirts of a humble village. Her name was Gwendolyn Pocket, with long blonde hair and eyes that sting.

            One day, she thought she would treat herself to crabcakes, and so ventured to the fish market on the other side of the village. The fish vendor caught her eye. She had spoken to him before. His name was Fernando Basura.

            As he meticulously wrapped her order, Gwen spontaneously asked what would have to happen so that they may marry. Fernando said he would have to strike it rich so he could spend time with his wife and children and not have to work any longer. She walked away with her crabcakes, smiling hopefully.

            She wandered into the antique store on the way out of the market and went directly to the back of the store where she found the lamp she was drawn to. She rubbed it to get a better look at the pattern and conjured SAMMY STINK, a genie who appears as a seven-year-old boy with a dark goatee.

            Sammy offered three wishes and Gwendolyn talked him into letting her think about it. She could not afford the lamp and had to steal it in her purse, walking out with Sammy’s hand in hers. She purposely left the market in a roundabout way so Fernando would not see her, but he did anyway smoking a cigarette, naturally suspicious, jealous even of Sammy.

            Gwendolyn decided, of course, to make Fernando stinking rich with her first wish. He won the lottery some days later and eventually married Gwen. Shortly after she made her first wish, she made her second, that Sammy would pose as her human son so she could prolong her third wish without it being too awkward.

            Fernando didn’t know about Sammy until they were already married and always had trouble adjusting to his presence. Gwen liked having him around, so Fernando made the most of it.

            Sammy Stink complained one night at dinner, about a toothache. Fernando didn’t seem to care and Gwendolyn didn’t believe him because she realized his mortality still, even though Sammy himself was in fact becoming attached, becoming human.

            He went by himself the next day to the dentist, by advice of Fernando (to whom his relationship was also becoming vague); the office of Dr. Jules Whitaker. When the doctor looked in Sammy’s mouth, they were horrified: two rows of mangled, rotting disaster. Jules didn’t know where to begin, left Sammy disappointed saying it would cost “millions.”

            “How can I afford that?” Sammy thought as he meandered home. He eventually decided to ask Fernando, who he knew was heir to a fortune, though Sammy was reluctant to bother him. Fernando initially refused, and recoiled in horror at the sight of Sammy’s mouth. In embarrassment and anger, Sammy innocently killed Fernando.

            Sammy stole the money and went back to the dentist. Upon the doctor seeing the money, it turned to sand and burned from their perspective. Jules was flabbergasted at the vision and made a reason for Sammy why they could not accept it and successfully turned Sammy away.

            When he got home, the police were there waiting for Sammy, who then took him away. Gwendolyn had called them when arriving home to a bloody mess. She was crying. When Sammy finally left prison after serving his life sentence, and having forgotten his own immortality, remained in a world long after his master had died without making her third wish.